Neverheard in New York

The trouble with eavesdropping is that we’re not living in an Aaron Sorkin show where witty banter is as prevalent as the air we breathe. That’s just not how it works in the real world. Our job is to get to the deeper, cleverer truths within the mundane asides of average schmoes. Here’s how it works. You hear something like what’s below. 

I’d go on a date with anyone at this point. 

Uh huh.

 

This is a typical conversation between two friends. Happens every day on the subway. This is when we go to work making magic from nothing. 

I’d go on a date with anyone at this point. Except a Nazi.

Uh huh. What?

I’d date basically anyone but a Nazi.

Your last boyfriend was a literal Nazi.

Much Like France, I’ve learned my lesson.  

 

So this is great. A perfect, realistic conversation. But what if it took place in LA instead of New York? 

 

I’d go on a date with anyone at this point. Except a drug trafficker.

Uh huh. What?

I’d date basically anyone but a cocaine kingpin. 

Your last boyfriend is serving a life sentence. 

It was fun while it lasted. And I’m a much better actor because of it. 

 

For Chicago, just add a few passing references to pizza and you should be good to go. And for Florida, change any words to grunts.