Friday, March 24, 2023

Russell Re-Brand

I used to be a decent actor, an okay comedian, and an exceptional addict. But I’m a changed man. I went from making jokes to making mantras. From globetrotting to podcast pontificating. Because now, I’m a self-styled guru who makes his living sitting on the floor in linen, silk, or nothing at all.

I own lots of pillows, scented candles and doors are a thing of the past. I’ve opted for beaded entrances only. I’m a conspiracy monger, artisanal cheese monger, you name it, I’m here to hawk it. 


It’s been a smart career move. I am lucky I wasn’t born during the heyday of Monty Python or Billy Connolly. Peter Sellers, I am not. I went from making some people laugh to making more people cry. It's just emotions.


You’re not supposed to take me seriously, but I sure do. Enough for the both of us. Don’t you worry. When you're a celebrity you can be half as smart and twice as rich. That equation has sure worked out well for me. While I couldn't get into any decent college, but I could start one quite easily. 


What’s amazing is that during this transformation it never occurred to me to shave.


 

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