Apocalypse
I’m not religious, per se, but having a rudimentary understanding of the Book of Revelation helps when putting current events in a broader, biblical context.
Boring
What readers should feel when consuming the news.
Clicks
The answer to every version of “why was this published?”
Duh
The proper response to a big story.
Evidence
What’s that?
Free
What most newspapers ought to cost.
Gotcha!
Journalism.
Housebreaking
What most newspapers ought to be used for.
Ideas
Good ones aren’t necessary.
Jargon
No article is complete without a healthy amount of.
Kabuki
Type of theater favored by most journos.
Lawyers
Thank God for them.
Malpractice
Not just for doctors.
Narrative
Making sense of reality.
Obvious
The subject of most editorials.
Pretentious
How to stay ahead of the audience.
Quit
The world would be improved if many did.
Repeat
There’s no such thing as saying the same thing too many times.
Sensationalism
The tone.
Tact
It’s unheard of.
UFOs
The stories that get pushed aside in favor of nonsense.
Vacant
The minds of most columnists.
Wit
Mostly absent.
X-Rated
Yeah right.
Yack
What regular people want to do after watching TV.
Zombie
The equivalent charisma and uncanny resemblance of most cable news hosts.
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