The New Creators

 

 

I used to think that being a creator meant toying with different species, controlling the weather, accelerating continental drift (geologic happenings can be so boring that watching paint dry is a viable and alternative form of entertainment), or sending hot lava from the depths of an active volcano into a beach resort at the exact moment a big luau was about to begin. You haven’t really had a true tropical cocktail unless your tiny umbrella has first been scorched by projectile magma. There’s something divine about the flavor generated from the coldness of the beverage and the warmth of the volcanic ash. Apparently, this type of creator behavior is old hat. 

Creators nowadays aren’t rolling together pieces of intergalactic dough in the hopes of baking an adequately textured asteroid. Some of the best chefs on earth don’t have enough patience when it comes to kneading iron-heavy space rubble. 

Creators today aren’t poring over lines of succession for a suitable ambassador here on earth, one wearing a crown a bit sturdier than one found in a bag of fast-food fries. 

Creators have shifted their focus away from bona fide miracles to “that’s kinda cool. Is that CGI?” The original creators never used technology, unless you count the atomic bomb or the printing press to get their message out. 

 

Creators aren’t answering calls from adoring fans yelling into stained glass skylights or burning plants. Although burning plants is a major factor for many of today’s biggest creators.  

These days, creators are found on TikTok, giving away their talents for free. Scripture? There’s not even structure. These new creators have put the old ones out of work. There are too many creators to count. Back in the day, you’d have a few reliable ones in the Middle east, several scattered around California and elsewhere, but that was pretty much it. 

I wish the new creators would borrow more from the ancient ones. Dancing is good, I like dancing. But where are the weird traditions, complicated and contradictory rules forbidding certain behaviors? Diet tips are a nice start, but in the old days, you didn’t give tips, you made proclamations that were followed or else. Think of these as suggestions.