Monday, May 1, 2023

Monday Morning Meditations

 

 When installing cable for a certain provider, is it okay to say, “I’m on the Spectrum?” 

 

How many times a day are we allowed to say “climate change, huh” when discussing the weather? 

 

How many people who “just read a book” actually consumed the audio book over the course of a long commute?

 

What’s more annoying: someone talking on speakerphone in public or someone in a headphone stupor, mindlessly pushing their way through the world? 

 

If Picasso was a great artist and a bad guy, how many bad artists are great guys?

 

Why is it extra to have a side salad when it’s basically rearranged grass? 

 

Why do sports fans use the first-person plural pronoun and wear jerseys of other people? 

 

What year will saying “I can’t wait to put my feet up on a plush ottoman” become offensive? 

 

Forget robots, aren't most people artificially intelligent?


And didn’t most Hollywood writers stop writing years ago? 


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