Turning Over an Old Leaf

It’s the first day of fall - autumn, sorry. For some, this means hours of sobbing in an empty tub, cursing summer’s relative shortness when compared to other, lengthier seasons. But for others who seemingly take life in stride, the mild sight of major decay is a wonderful time to still be alive. For them, a new season means turning over a new leaf.

Or does it?

Turning over a new leaf is a standard, accepted practice for changing one’s overall outlook. But no one thought to ask a few salient questions before jumping into the pile like a possessed peeper on peyote. For instance, where is this leaf? And what is this leaf? Neither are ever specified. It’s impossible to turn over a leaf that’s alive. I suppose that’s only partially true. You can turn over a living leaf – only by doing so you’ll kill it, twisting it out of the branch and onto the ground. Nice job, murderer. 

The ground, that’s where most people assume these “new leaves” reside. Fine, I can handle that. But only if we accept that by turning them, all we’re doing is mulching the ground. What’s on other side of a dead leaf? Worms? Those creepy crawler things that hide on the underside of a wet piece of bark in a desolate forest? The turning of leaves like that is frightening. It almost makes you want to go back to a simpler time without leaves, trees or wilderness. The desert, perhaps.

Good news. Leaves aren’t the only things worth turning over for a fresh start. And they’re not new if they’re on the ground. New to you maybe. But if I finally get around to watching The Magnificent Ambersons tonight, that doesn’t make the 70-year-old film new, now does it? 

How about a rock? Rocks are nice. Easy to clean, easy to hold, and they vary in size from pebbles to peaks. That's diversity. Turning one of them over is actually possible without destroying the entire ecosystem in the process. 

So on this day, the autumnal equinox, don’t turn over any leaves hoping it’ll steer you in the right direction. All you need is some stones.